and sometimes I still find myself looking in your eyes for the pieces you took away from me, thinking maybe I will recognize a certain color that looks like an answer or a reason why, but emptiness never painted itself in a specific shade. I never could find my way through the space that hides between the black and white. The blank in the gray grabs me before I have a chance to focus and the hands in the fog are thick enough with indifference, I have nothing left but resentment that grew cold under a sky raining colorblind. The sun stops shining after a while, you know? Not all of us feel the same warmth. Maybe some of us never do. I wasted so many wishes on stars that were always only listening to someone else or perhaps my wishes broke the whole damn sky with their desperation. It doesn’t matter anyway. There’s not many chances when it’s too late. And it is too late. You can’t hold my pieces hostage and expect me to be whole. You can’t keep me in the gray and expect me to keep sparkling. You just can’t break someone and keep placing bets on how long they’ll stay in pieces. And you can’t keep the pieces you took and take credit for having your life together so perfectly. You never did shine on your own. You took the best of me and laughed when I fell, but I’d rather stay down than walk through life with courage that isn’t my own. Your eyes are colored with bullshit and your spine is from the string of a coward; My only wish is to see the day when that string snaps.