That Woman

Some think I’m reserved,

quiet and soft spoken in my ways.

More conservative in my thoughts,

perhaps some find me stand-offish,

snobby, stuck up in my silence.

Maybe some judge me as harsh,

cold, caustic if you will, with the

entitlement I wear every day like

an outfit I chose to slip into.

But, look again. Look again.

You cannot look at someone’s life

as a passerby, a stranger who has

never looked into my eyes, and

claim to know who I am or where

I came from. You don’t know me.

I am not like them.

I am not that woman

who can go live on a moments notice

and shine no matter what.

I am not that woman

whose confidence spills over

from my eyes to my smile

to my voice that shines

with everything that’s right

even when it’s wrong.

But I want to be.

I never learned that

I don’t know how to be that.

So, I watch the ones who are that

and I want to be them.

For one hour,

I wish I had the courage

to do something like that.

And some days,

I wish just making a phone call

didn’t feel like suiting up for war.

I wish walking outside

didn’t feel like being lost.

I wish I didn’t let fear define me,

but these butterflies

always tell me it’s too much.

These butterflies tell me

go back inside,

maybe try again tomorrow.

So, I just watch her and think

one day I’m going to be brave

like she always is.

-Stephanie Bennett-Henry

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s